Dogs Are Cool

Lately I have been spending the majority of my time with dogs.
I find their personalities easy to be around...they stick to the basics in life, and they do not know how to act phony, unlike us HUMANS.
Do I sound bitter?
Maybe. It's just that life is just too friggin short to "try" and figure out what is on any humans mind.
If you don't like something. Growl already.
Something pleases you. Wag your tail.
It's simple really.
So why do HUMANS have to make things so complicated?
And dogs do not require a whole lot of maintenance. Feed regularly, an occasional scratch behind the ears, maybe a bath or a good brushing once in awhile. Yearly check ups, oh and timely visits outside to go poop. If you choose to throw in a few extra doses of love and respect...you will have the type of friend that you could only hope to be.
Yea, dogs are cool.

I Like Sampling

Yesterday was THE BEST DAY EVER for samples!!! I know it might seem silly, but a good freebie can truly brighten my day. There actually is an art to sampling if you think about it.
If I want company on my excursions to Costco, all I have to do to entice someone is to remind them about ALL THE SAMPLES there.
Timing is everything, if you go too late in the work day, the nice cart people are winding things down and ready to hit the road, irgo zero to no samples. If you go on a Saturday or Sunday, you have to fight the shopping carts and other samplers and frankly it just isn't worth it.
So Rule One is:
*timing is everything
Usually the people cooking and handing out the samples are very sweet so you "should" allow them to give their little spiel about the product, mumble something asking where is it located...blah blah blah, maybe even grab the product (if you are a insecure sampler or perhaps have actually taken seconds) then stash it on another aisle.
Rule Two:
*be polite, even if it gags you, smile and move on. After all they did not invent the product.
Rule Three:
*keep it quick...
smile, grab and go.

Let's get back to WHY yesterday was so awesome for sampling.
I did not go to Costco.
I went to a fancy organic grocery store. A person on a limited budget could almost get a complete, tasty meal at one of these stores!
Seriously.
Saturday and Sundays are usually THE ONLY days that these type of stores will put out samples. Of course they are hoping to entice the more upscale shopper, but heck, who needs to know if you are actually buying or not? A good day of sampling will lift anyones spirits, especially if you are on a BUDGET.
The best part about these stores is that they do not expect to banter back and forth with you so the sampling experience can be one of quiet joy.
I went to TWO stores yesterday....
Store One I enjoyed *Organic Potato & Garlic Soup with fresh bread. (there were 4 different types of bread to choose from!) WITH whipped Irish Butter, I also had Chocolate/Cherry Bread Pudding, (warmed up of course) and a piece of Organic Cinnamon Swirly Bread.
YUM.
Oh and a small little cuppa joe (organic of course)
Store Two
I had PIZZA.
And it was good. I tried to snatch one for my boyfriend who was off shopping in a different store...which brings me to:
Rule Four:
Do not hesitate! Granted one must not appear to be greedy, but if there is no one around...JUST DO IT! If you DO grab two and someone is watching...be prepared for the evil eye, in which case quickly escape down another aisle.
Happy Sampling!

Looking for a Rental....

We are looking for a new place to live. We have to rent. We are clean, (almost too much so), hardworking, pay the rent on time, improve the rental tenants. We also have one dog and one cat, who are generally more respectful of property than most humans. And yet, why is it next to impossible to find a place? Oh, there are a kazillion rentals out there, most do not allow any type of four legged creature at all, AND if they do, be prepared to pay boo-koo extra. Now we do not mind this, and understand that there are many unrespectful humans and animals out there and that these extra fees help the landlord protect his property. What about protection for the people who are paying your mortgage? That's right, your TENANTS.
It is shocking to see a picture, (become optimistic even) read the advertisement, and then actually go and see the property. Rentals ask for $1000 down/ $400 cleaning fee and yet leave the person paying all of the fees drawers full of old food, appliances not cleaned, or screens coming off of doors and windows. One place advertised a seperate garage...and neglected to mention that most of the roof had caved in.
Nice.
Seriously, if I was in "the dating mode" I would be VERY scared to meet someone on line if they represented themselves as "honestly" as people who advertise their rentals do. More times than not, the pictures of the places are old perhaps taken before time had taken it's toll on it, or enhanced by a digital guru.
The search will continue.
SOMEWHERE there has got to be a place to call home where doors work, has decent sized rooms, neighbors who are not crazy (crazy in a good way, not scary crazy) a yard for our dog to sniff around in peace and windows for our cat to watch birds from. That's not too much to ask is it? Oh and perhaps hardwood floors. We will pay our rent on time, keep it clean, practice our music at respectful times and even plant flowers in the yard.

Faith

What is your definition of a Fresh Start?

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end”….

Doors close and a window opens (or so they say). It seems that sometimes the doors in my life have not only closed, they have friggin slammed shut, hitting me on the backside, propelling me forward, but… to what?

I know. Another door may, possibly, o.k. WILL open (usually one that I have not considered going through) and I find myself wondering if I really want to go through this "stuff" again. I would like to say that I take a "leap of faith", however it is more like I stick my foot in the water and wiggle around a toe or two before figuring out that I just need to CANNON BALL it and jump in.

I have lived in fine homes and been comfortable financially. I have also had to sell my favorite possessions on Craigslist to pay rent and used a credit card to buy groceries. Faith gets me through the grey times. I call them "grey" because no matter how bad it seems I have never looked at a situation as being totally dark. Something deep inside tells me that with just a glimmer of hope the grey will continue to lighten and things WILL get better. Eventually.

The animals that share this world with us do not vex themselves as to whether they will have a home to live in or a meal to eat. Granted, sometimes these things are difficult to obtain, however they KNOW that they will be provided for. I wish I was more animal like at times. I guess all I can do is to remind myself that the next time I begin to use energy to stress or worry about what could, would or should be I just need to step outside and watch a bird zooming or a squirrel leaping from tree to tree and hopefully that will snap me out of my crazy human thinking.

Relationships

You KNOW you are in a committed relationship when you let your partner share the bathroom with you.
It's easy to share the bedroom (well for most), the living room, easybeezy, the kitchen has it's fair share of "I do it this way moments", however the bathroom, now THAT'S another story.
It's funny how when a relationship is new a person spends much of their time attempting to pretend that they are not 100% human...example: burping, passing "gas", snotty sneezing and doing other slightly gross but very necessary body functions. Unlike the animal kingdom, we DISGUISE the way we look and smell until we can be sure that the person we are trying to impress is hooked.
And then it happens. You let a little "toot" and own up to it, maybe turn red, or giggle it off, however the main point is that you actually let it out instead of knotting up your insides trying to hold it in. That's the first step, and I believe a truly big one. At this point you know that the relationship is progressing to the point of telling your significant other that they have food in their teeth, a bugger in their nose, or that they have a bad case of halitosis. O.K. maybe that will take a bit more time.
So you are sharing living quarters and starting to relax. Except in the bathroom. Some couples never actually get to the point of sharing the bathroom, and that's o.k.
I'm not talking about figuring out who gets what shelf in the medicine cabinet, or even the save water shower with a friend concept. You know where this is going. That's right, the ability to actually be able to use the toilet WHILE your partner is in the shower or busy doing make up. This is HUGE.
So in pondering the benefits of living in a very small 700 sq ft, one bathroom, one closet apartment I have come to the conclusion that it will either make or break a relationship. Time tells all and as the expression goes, you can run but you cannot hide.... Who needs a diamond ring to "tell her how much you care". If your partner has endured all of the above and more and STILL thinks you are beautiful/handsome/awesome...
THAT MUST BE LOVE.

The Domino Effect

It happens all the time. With me it usually starts out first thing in the morning. Forget the "good intentions" of beginning my day, waking up slowly and easing into it with a bit of quiet reflection...
First the cat either decides to lick my arm (with her sand-paper little tongue) which in turn wakes up the dog, whom we REALLY try not to wake up until at the very EARLIEST 5:45 a.m.
Which then means the dog will start her click-click click-yty pacing until someone gets her ready to go outside.
All of that wakes up MY own addiction for a cup of Stumptown coffee...SO might as well stay awake, feed the dog and start the coffee.
It doesn't end there.
Remember the afore mentioned "domino effect"? Keeping that in mind I should know not to attempt something too technical like entering something in my planner and then deciding to White it Out. White Out is great, and is a remarkable invention, however one should note that if one drops an extra blob they should NOT use their finger to wipe it up. I now have FIVE fingers that have traces of whiteness all over them as the stuff does NOT rinse out well. It is not as evil as super glue, however it does stick and spread when it comes in contact with water.
Oh well.
I guess I could hope that this "domino effect" could turn into really good, great and fun things happening one after the other throughout my day.
For some reason it usually doesn't happen that way, does it?

45minutes later...
It, (being the White Out) is on the soap pump, and on the faucet handles, oh and I found a smudge on the door knob.
And so it goes.

These are a Few of My Favorite Things

French pressed Stumptown coffee.
The smell of evergreens in our very cold, damp little Portland apt.
Hand-made snowflakes silently moving from the ceiling (it FEELS cold enough to snow in here!)
Decorating a gingerbread house.
Kazoo caroling. (can't sing)
Colorful lights.
People being kind,
loving
and jolly.
Music of the season...sort of picky though
I like the "croon and swoon" Rosemary Clooney era AND
Trans Siberian Orchestra AND
Rennaisance era Christmas carols
Baking
Watching Classic Holiday movies with my dog, my kat, my partner... and a warm blanket.

Remembering.

"Never a Christmas morning
Never the old year ends
But someone thinks of someone
Old days, old times, old friends."

These are just a few of my Favorite Things

The Automotive Philosopher

"You do not need to be sick to get better."

Now I think that sounds very "profound". Especially since I saw it all bold and out there written in funky black all capitol letters. You know, the boards that automotive places use to advertise their specials. Churches are also known to put "profound" messages for all to see utilizing the same funky black all capitol letters. I think the signs in front of the automotive places probably get read more. The words may be similar, however they just seem less judgmental located in front of a building that has broken down cars versus a "come in my brethren" pristine building.

So how DO those mechanics get to be so wise and articulate? Maybe it's because as a rule they are much deeper philosophically than outward appearances?? Hmmm working on a car WOULD give a person ample time to ponder the deeper questions of the universe. And cars do not jibber jabber back at you which allows for a quieter meditative atmosphere.


Maybe I should learn how to work on a car so I can find the answer?

In the meantime next time you drive by one of those automotive repair places take the time to READ their message.

You just might learn something.

**Just read a new one that I could identify with:
"Procrastinate now~don't put it off!"

here's another one: (same mechanic, different day)
"Never rationalize anything that feels wrong"

can you believe it? 11/22/09 this one is from the same mechanic!:
"Never surrender your dreams to noisy negatives."

13 February 2011
I had to add a couple more philosophical musings to this blog! 

"You don't just deal with adversity you use it to propel you forward."

"I hate the moment in an argument when I realize I am wrong."

Our personal mechanic Jake may not offer to the universe wise words of wisdom (at least not on a public board that I know of) however, we are most grateful that he and his team are the best with our vehicles ailments. 

Station Five... continued

So I wrote about my "trauma" as a child at Station Five. Remember the summer swim lessons? The angst of not going on to Station Six or Seven?

Sometimes my body feels like I am the Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz with no frickin oil! So, my daughter, knowing the benefits of a water workout, has bought me 20 visits to the neighborhood pool. That's right, they call it lap swim. Oh joy.

After careful consideration I figured what do I have to lose except the muffin top? I was older. I was wiser. And I KNEW I could do the lap thing AND keep my face out of the water if I wanted to. It's called a backstroke. So I agreed and embarked on overcoming the Station Five mentality that has haunted me for so long.

First morning I get into the SLOW lane with an elderly lady and another woman. I thought that it would be a "safe" lane to "test the waters" with to gauge my fitness level and ability. Technically one is supposed to swim on the right, sort of like driving a car, and go in a circle. I lowered myself into the water and started doing a little make-shift side stroke (with my head above the water of course) allowing enough space behind the elderly woman, or so I thought. Before I knew it, she had zoomed to one end of the pool and was heading back... right at me...on my side! She could not see me as she was doing the backstroke, MY stroke! I quickly did an about face and paddled back to the edge of the pool. Perhaps I would wait until she was done...and my ego had recuperated. Nothing like someone 20 years older (or more!)almost running me over in the slow lane to have a reality check! To make matters worse when I left the pool, I was still in a dither from my ineptness and lack of fitness that I went to use the toilet and automatically put down the protective seat cover paper.
Not good.
Especially when one is still totally wet from being in the pool.

I guess I am going to have to work extra hard to break free from Station Number Five.

Little Pieces

Little Pieces.
You find them in random places, at random times, and wonder...what does this thing go with?? If anything at all?
It is alone.
It might be a button, that was once a part of a totally cool blouse ensemble. Or perhaps it is a unique looking cap thing that appears to screw onto something, but that couldn't possibly work on anything other than the original something it was meant to be a part of.
Now do you get what I mean?
So what does a person DO with these random little piece of somethings that FOR sure belong somewhere but you just don't know where?
SAVE IT.
Hey that's what the "junk drawer" was specifically designed for right? An old Christmas tin that originally held fruit cake from your great aunt in Florida can hold little doodlidoos. The main thing is NOT to get rid of it. EVER. Because once an object is deemed useless, (and this happens when a person does not know what the purpose is of said object, then we tend to want to pass it on, throw it away. When that moment arrives that you DO decide to pass it on, guaranteed, (and this will happen in a time frame when you will REMEMBER that you got rid of the little piece).
The "Little Piece" mystery of where it belonged will be solved.
You will be moving things around in the attic and see that the decorative screw thingy that holds the shade on to your one of a kind retro lamp...is missing.
Regrettably, you will know that it was YOU who tossed the piece.
A lesson learned.
Save the little pieces.
A button or a small chunk of decorative wood all belong somewhere. Perhaps the little piece will not make it back to it's original home...but it COULD find a new place, substituting for some other misplaced piece, doing it's part in the big scheme of things to bring balance and beauty to the world.

If Thou Art a Writer

"If thou Art a Writer"
Am I? I enjoy playing around with words. Writing, to me, resembles a jenga puzzle. The right word can help the process, the wrong word, well if you have ever played jenga you know what happens when you choose a incorrect piece. It "all comes tumbling down". I wrote a blog on the art of procrastination. Something I excel at when it comes to embarking on my career as a writer.
Its time to stop the crap, take pen to paper (or in my case fingers to keyboard) and start doing it. I will never know if I can do this thing if I never give myself a shot at it.
I have a quote, that I read every day, (yet have thus far not embraced as a way of life) by Henry David Thoreau. He writes:
If thou art a writer, write as if time were short, for indeed it is short at the longest.
In other words quit messing around and write!
I hearby challenge myself, on this 11th day of July in the year 2008, to a month long commitment of DAILY WRITING! AND it has to be for AT LEAST 1 HOUR. Just so I am making myself perfectly clear:

ONE MONTH
ONE HOUR
EVERYDAY

NO EXCUSES

Lucy the Dog

Lucy did not know she was a dog.
The furry appearance, wagging tail, wet black nose...all gave the appearance of doggyhood.
Lucy was so much more.
We humans all read about how we can be BETTER at being a human. More kind, more loving, more decent. Isn't it interesting to note that dogs do not need to read up on these things, listen to tapes or attend workshops.
They just are.
A kinder, more loving, more decent more forgiving human I have not encountered.
I consider myself lucky that she blessed my life for ten years. I was a tough "assignment". Lucy witnessed many things that most humans would shake their heads in judging disbelief. Lucy offered unconditional, loving, friendship. She knew when a walk would benefit me more than her, and with a knowing wag of her tail could coax me out of the darkest of thoughts to take her out.
I miss her.
I read somewhere that all dogs go to heaven...
I do not doubt that. Lucy wore her wings every day during her too brief of stay here with me.



Lucy's Favorite Song written for her by Nate, Laura and Shiloh
Tucson, Arizona summer 2005

Lucy Bucy Bucy the Dog.
Lucy Bucy Bucy the Dog.
She likes to take her monkeys everywhere.


She likes to howl in the car.
She thinks shes a real rock star.
She brightens every minute every day...


It doesn't matter how late you sleep,
She greets you in the morning.

It doesn't matter what mood you're in,
She brings you a monkey.

Lucy Bucy Bucy the Dog.
Lucy Bucy Bucy the Dog.
She likes to take her monkeys everywhere.

Resumes

So what exactly IS a resume? According to the definition in my dictionary it means "a summary". In the quest for gainful employment that summary usually is a one page document of whom you have worked for and how long. It also allows the person for whom the resume is highlighting the opportunity to summarize their key qualifications as well as their education.
Wouldn't it be fun to just "let loose" and write down whatever you wanted without the worries of how it looked on paper?
For instance when one of those dreaded time gaps appears, it would be great to put down what you REALLY did.
Feb 1996-March 1997 Hung out at various relatives and friends houses seeking inner peace and a good tan.
or
May 1995-current Went friggin bonkers at home taking care of the young'uns.
I guess there is no place in the work force for this type of honesty. What if we could answer the application questions with the same type of openess?
Reason for leaving job? The manager/owner/boss was a lunatic!!
Pay that you desire? Enough to get me to Italy at least once a year.
Do you require time and a half for working holidays, weekends or beyond your usual full time hours? No, I do not have a life beyond my work here at "Quickee-Mart" so who needs to make more than minimum wage????
What can you bring to this position? How about you treat me good and I will ditto.

Looking For Work

Looking for "A JOB" sucks. Especially when due to circumstances happen beyond ones control create what the job industry calls "gaps" in your work history. You know those times in your life when you are busy just surviving at some crap job hoping you can get far enough ahead to find a less crappy job and so on and so on. "Gaps" is actually a nice way to phrase it. However when one has these on their resume and even worse has numerous jobs in a short frame of time... the Human Resource Lord looks upon these as deeming you unsuitable to be worthy of an interview.
I was blessed to be fired the day after Christmas. Yea, the day after the holiday that celebrates all that is good in mankind. (Unless Scrooge was your employers idol) I say I was blessed because this job was one of crappier jobs I have endured. I was released and set free. Yay! Broke, worried, and ego slightly bruised but free. I cannot believe that I actually allowed some small minded person to belittle me and treat me disrespectfully for so long.
My days are now spent filling out forms trying to convince someone out there that I AM WORTHY! I am really! I multitask, have an attention to detail, and a sense of humor and most importantly I will perform my duties to the best of my ability even if my supervisor is an asshole. O.K. I realize that I am using this blog to vent a bit. I believe I am allowed. I got a wrong number today on my cell phone. She sounded official. When she called back again I asked her if somehow she had gotten my name mixed up with another person and did she have a job? I wanted to tell her DON'T HANG UP!! I am worthy to talk to about the position! It was just a wrong number. At that moment I realized that this job search thing was consuming me and that I had to let it go and trust.

Trust that a power much larger than JobDango had my best interests at heart and that all will be as it is meant to be and it will be good, and respectful and fulfilling. Yes, I am worthy.

Station Five

Funny how memories, especially ones that involve large groups of people, embarrassment, fear and a host of other emotions can come back to haunt a person, no matter how much time has elapsed.

It was my sixth summer I believe and time to leave the little "guppy pool" at the park and learn how to swim with the big kids.

There were many of us that summer that signed on for the lessons. The groups were large, time was short, so we were grouped according to age and then expected to progress from station to station mastering different aspects of water safety and know how by the time we got to station 12 and the DEEP END.

Notice I said there was a deep end...my definition of deep end was anywhere in the pool beyond the 3 FT. mark. (most of us soon to be in first grade were not so tall) Anyway, for the first four stations I moved along quite nicely. I was bonding with the other kids, splashing and using the kick board in the proper manner. All was good until I came to STATION FIVE.

"What do you mean we are supposed to jump in?" The instructor had just informed our group that we would line up, jump in (this was the 5 ft above our head area) then paddle back to the side. The 'lesson" at this station was that we could indeed hold our breath as we "went under". I was o.k. with the jumping in part...(well sort of o.k.) A person can only move to the back of the line so many times before the instructors notice that you have yet to complete the task. To this day I am not sure how I managed to muster up the courage to finally jump in...what still amazes me is that I was able to jump in and NOT get my face wet!! I actually think that is a good anti drowning tactic, however the instructors did not care for my unique style. We were shuffled through the exercise repeatedly and each time I was able to jump in and keep my face from ever getting wet! If I remember correctly, the instructors even tried to get the "more advanced" teacher to coach me. It didn't work.

So my "group" moved on the Staion 6, Station 7 and so on and so on, WAVING at me from the OTHER side of the pool while I spent the remainder of the summer session at STATION FIVE.

Years passed and I finally, sort of, overcame my extreme aversion to getting my face wet. Deciding to relinquish my "stuck at Station Five" label, I participated in a mini triathlon, (you know where you bike, run and SWIM). I asked if a snorkle and swim mask would be permitted. (they thought I was joking) Making sure I did not slap the other swimmer in my lane, (and that I stayed in my lane) the BACK STROKE seemed to be the logical answer to the swim part of the competition.

I call it working with what you got.

I Feel Pretty

No Pain No Gain...
No wonder women have earned a few nicknames that are less than complementary. Pain is the name of the game if you are female. I won't even go into having a baby or the monthly blahs that we have each and every month until our bodies decide to go haywire with menopause. What I 'm talking about is a beauty regimen called FACIALS . I cannot BELIEVE that women actually have this done on a regular basis and pay mucho bucks for also! What I unknowingly got myself into was a simple little procedure called "micro-abrasion" I should of checked into the abrasion part a little closer. After a nine-plus hour waitress shift I was eager for my relaxing "treat". Little did I know what was in store for me. Soon, my already sweaty face from an extra long work day would have hot steam blasting directly at me (foreshadowing the fun that was yet to come). Not so bad I thought, sort of relaxing....until the "scalpel" or some sort of metal apparatus came out to seek and pop every last little black head or pimple on my face. Once done with that procedure, the "mini-me" of belt sanders was fired up to buff away a layer of skin. I can best describe that as a thorough licking by a cat with a very rough tongue.

I feel pretty, oh so pretty.

Cookies

It's early.
It's dark outside,
and a bit chilly.
So I am going to bake some cookies.
The soft, almost melted chocolate chip type, with real butter butter.
Soul Food.

Cookies have a way of making any situation a little bit better, IF they are genuinely created with that ONE ingredient that store purchased cookies cannot replicate. That's right, a bit of love (and of course butter butter) will make them authentic "good for your soul" food.

Yum.

So Why Bother?

It is now the day after Thanksgiving. Reflecting on my past year, I have ALOT to be grateful for...family and good friends helping out and coming through when it was and is so difficult to ask for help. The decisons and path I have chosen to walk have not been the easy one, choosing to listen to my heart and intuition instead of the steady, $$ secure way.
I believe I have a purpose here...it's just been difficult figuering out what that is! When I begin a new venture and think a-haaa this is what I am meant to do. It gets taken away or stopped. After my down time I pick myself up and begin the whole process again, (and again and again).
So why do it at all?
I am broke, I struggle and spend all my energy working for people who don't give a rats ass about anyone other than their own personal gain, and somehow in the midst of everything I am supposed to try and figure out what I should be doing?

I could use some help down here!

Procrastination...the art of not doing what you gotta do.

I awoke early this morning and decided that I am soooo tired of excuses! Have you ever noticed how the world (mine especially) is full of them. There is always a reason for not doing this or that. Well the buck has to stop somewhere and I decided that I needed to do just that.
So I want to write...Life keeps throwing out curveballs and I am able to catch them however it is at the expense of doing something that I want to do AND get better at.
Hence, this mornings blog.
It might not be the most thought out blog I have written, however I AM sitting here and doing it.
Yay.

Store Music

Store Music. It is meant to be in the background. You know that "noise" that large stores play to help the shopper get in a zombie state of mind to spend more money? I believe they call it elevator music although usually one can be zapped by it even when they are not in an elevator. I usually rate the stores on a scale of one to ten on how quickly the music is able to work its way into my brain to begin its damage. If by chance I find myself humming one of the tunes that are being played I ask my support network (whomever I am shopping with) to please remove me from the premises as quickly as possible before permanent damage is done. If I find myself HAVING to shop in a store that is noted for their worm into your brain music, I try to protect myself when entering the premises with my own inner tune. If the store in question is particulary bad, a set of headphones is my main artillary for protection. If it is TRULY mind altering, then I break out my kazoo, which results in the removal of my person from the premises, which is insurance that my brain will be protected.
Once in a blue moon a place of business might actually play music condusive to the task at hand. Mariachi music fills the aisles of one grocery store chain here in the southwest. I find myself doing a polka shuffle with the shopping cart. Nice.