Saturday, March 01, 2014

A Re-Write

Have you ever done something over and over and OVER...and you know it needs to change, but you have been doing it for sooooo long that wish as you might,
it. just. does. not. happen.
And perhaps you feel frustrated.
Or angry. Or sad. Or totally fed up with yourself, and yet the behavior continues?
I look in the mirror and say "Oh yea, that's me." And yes I do feel totally frustrated, angry, sad, and fed up with mySELF! :( One would think that with all of those negative emotions whirling and twirling inside of me that I could change, that I would WANT to change. Years of therapy, self talk and all that jazz have not managed to do the trick...YET.
The other morning during the first walk of the day with Kona the dog, I had a profound epiphany! You heard me, I am labeling it profound!
It was on June 19, 1965 that I was caught sneaking off to play one beautiful Saturday morning, BEFORE my chores had been done. When I finally arrived back at the house for a mid-morning snack, I was greeted? by my mother who was NOT in a snack provinding mood, (SMACK-ing would be a more appropriate assessment of the situation) Not knowing what punishment would be dealt out for my crime, my mother took a less physical route and instructed me to write a letter to her as to what I thought my appropriate disciplinary action should be. The letter was to include a list as to what my house hold duties were. At the time of said letter I was nine years old.
Since the letter IS 49 years old I will not make a copy of it to use in this blog (although my pensmanship was very impressive if I do say so myself) I will write it down verbatim:

June 19, 1965

Mother,
All my jobs are sweeping doing all the dishes, clean my bedroom, clean the bathroom, make my bed, clean the house, dust. The time I should play is after all my work is done. And helping you with your work and helping the boys. What you should do when I don't do my work is weap me or make me stay in our yard for a month or two months or make me stay in my room for a coply of days or not let me watch T.V. for a week or not let me play with my toys for a coply of days or not let me ride my bike for a coply of days or make me go to bed at 7:00 p.m. or 7:30 p.m. or not pay me an allows for a long time.
The time I'm supost to do my work is in the morning before I go out and play.

Laura

Can you believe that I have had that letter with me for all this time?! It was given to me when I left home so that I would remember (like I could ever forget?) the proper order of how to do things, and that play before work is taboo. Well, after much distress over my inability to get the things done in my life that I really want and would love to get done, my epiphany told me that it was time for a REWRITE!!
So here goes:
28 February 2014

Laura,
All my things that I love to do are talking with animals, sitting next to a nice tree, savoring a perfect latte,strolling in the sunshine, writing from my soul,loving myself. The time I should work is after all my things that I love to do are done.And having coffeetimes with Nate and hanging out with my grandmunchkins. What I should do when I don't do the things that I love to do is pet Kona or Zoey, or go on holiday for a month or two months or curl up in a chair and read for a coply of days or watch Sherlock or Star Trek for a week or let me play with the munchkins for a coply of days or let me ride my bike with Nate for a coply of days (sunny weather!) or make me stay in bed reading until 7am or 7:30am or treat myself to something new for a long time.
The time I'm supost to do things that I love to do is in the morning before I do any work.
Laura
P.S. It's time to FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS!
My Munchkins!!!

bicycles, coffee and thee

3 comments:

Hello, I'm Sally. said...

I like your updated letter! Take time to enjoy life first.

Hello, I'm Sally. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
miss mooty said...

Thanks Sally! Am working on it!